W A L L S

 I had to say no 

Over and over 

I had to take the same action 

Over and over

I’m getting tired 

Of making no progress 

I’m getting tired 

Of trying so hard

And getting nowhere 

  I’ve taken away the problem 

But I know that won’t fix it 

Sooner or later 

I have to face it 

With fists up and jaw set 

I need to conquer this 

But it won’t just go down 

It keeps coming back up 

So I’m going to fight 

And build walls 

To keep myself 

From going there 

And I’ll try again

Happy Songs

These are songs I listen to just to make the day happier. I will note, most of these are older songs and a lot of them are not Christian, but they are all super clean. I do not recommend all songs by these artists. 

Happy Together by The Turtles

Daydream Believer by The Monkees 

Come On Get Happy by The Patridge Family 

Sweet Caroline by Neil Diamond 

Here Comes The Sun by The Beatles 

Believe it or Not by Joey Scarbury 

Unicorn by Irish Rovers 

Fireflies by Owl City 

If you prefer, here is the pandora playlist. Just note that Happy Together is not the original version because it's not available on Pandora. 

What is your favorite happy song?

L E T T I N G G O

 I never thought something I prayed for

Something I longed for daily

Could hurt this bad

That a relationship beginning to rebuild

Would feel like ripping open my heart

I didn’t know forgiveness

Could feel so much like trust

It’s funny how so often

What I pray for

And what I need

Are the most painful things to endure

And the things I think are grounding me

Are really just helping me be self-dependent

Instead of Christ dependent

It seems that this is a year of letting go

And of new beginnings

Of learning to be okay

When it doesn’t feel okay

Of learning to let go

And to trust The Solid Rock 

July Highlights

It was a crazy month, but mostly super awesome stuff!!

I got my dress for Kate's wedding!! I'm offically very excited for November. =D I hated to tuck that beautiful dress into the back of my closet, but it's there, waiting with my shoes that I got just for this. But even though Kate asked me to be her bridesmaid first, I will be in my sister Sarah's wedding first. I still haven't gotten my outfit for that though. 

I started a new job for the next few months. Its an evening job, taking place half before they go to bed, and half after. I have never had a job where I retreated the kids going to bed so much. We've held matchbox car races, had pillow fights, and done a lot of coloring. And after they go to bed, I've done a lot of writing. I love how quiet it is after the kids go to sleep, it's perfect for catching up on writing.  

My sister Grace and I tried Crayon melting art, which was super fun! I loved doing it, though we did make the mistake of using a plastic sheet underneath it and it melted as we melted the crayons. XD

I did CampNaNo, and aimed for 30k. It was much rougher then I anticipated, but I did manage it,  finishing with nine minutes to spare on the 31'st. I was re-writing a story that I finished before, and I am rallying looking forward to finishing it. 

This is at McKinney Falls

For fourth of July my family had a hamburger cookout, which was super fun! Our neighbors put on an amazing firework show, so we set up at the end of our road and watched it! 

For my birthday my mom took me shopping. We really didn't buy much, but it was super fun! She took me to Outback Steakhouse of the first time and it was amazing! We found a deal on glass-bottom boats on the river, so we did a tour, which was awesome! They show you around the plant life, and fish, its amazing! 

Some of the kids I watch were in a Sound of Music play and we went to see it as a family. It was stunning. I didn't really expect to much, but was blown away by the caliber of the singing and acting. We actually went to see it twice. XD

My mom sister and I went for a hike at McKinney Falls for Rebekkah's birthday. The falls part of that are very, very small, but it was really fun to see! The header image is from that trip. =D 

Hannah and I met to walk around Salado. It had an adorable farmers market and the river was beautiful! I hadn't really gotten the chance to walk around that small town, so it was delightful to get to do it with a friend. 

There has been a lot going on in my life that I'm just not ready to share yet. I'm feeling fake when I only post the good stuff, but I'm just not ready to share a lot of it yet. So I guess all that was to say, I want be honest with y'all, but barring my heart through anything other then poetry hasn't been doable yet. With the end of summer comes my heavy work schedule and my sisters wedding, so I may be taking a break pretty soon for all of that. 

My favorite new read was definitely Shadow by Kara Swanson. Her duolagy about Peter Pan was amazing! My least favorite new read was The Nature of a Lady by Roseanna White, which was really disappointing since I normally love her books, but this one fell flat.  

Toy Story 1-3: My sister and I binged these in one day, enjoying getting some work done while re-watching these classics. I don't love number one, but two is amazing, and three is my favorite of all four movies. 

Zorro: My mom and I are watching through this series together. It is amazing! 

Mysterious Benedict Soucity: Kate and I had such a fantastic time watching this series together! We actually just finished today, but I'm going to lump it in with July. It had some parts that were very different then the book, but I loved it! It was a really cool adaptation. 

Chosen Season 2: Season 2 finale was not what I expected, but really good! The way they did the beatatutes was amazing!

Phineas and Ferb: I watched this mostly with my friends M&S. We share a love of the show, so it was really fun to share it with them!

Cars: I was shown this movie, and honestly, I thought it was boring. McQueen was okay, but I didn't really care about what happened. 

Moana: I enjoyed parts of this a lot, like the songs. But so much of it felt weird (The coconuts and legit ghoast. O.o), I didn't really enjoy it overall. 

The Emperors New Groove: I did not like this at all. I'd heard for years about how funny it was, but I didn't really enjoy it at all. The characters were rude, and I didn't feel like I had anyone to cheer for. 

How Do I Say This Summer of 1999

Life Whimscial Writing for His Glory 

Making Space Once Upon an Ordinary 

It's Been a Hot Minute... Stories by Firefly

5 Tips for Taking Cute Photos Life Without a Latte

2021 Mid Year Book Freak-Out Tag Hailey Hudson

Kitten Adventures + Family Pictures Ellens Musings

In Which We Set Up a Flower Truck A Farm Girls Life

How was your month? What did you do for the Forth of July?

S A B O T A G E

 Today I feel ill-equipped 

To talk about 

What I care about 

I say I care about God 

But I haven’t been investing 

I say I’ve been praying for people 

But I know the prayers are far between 

I say I want to put others first 

But I know I’ve been putting myself first 

I say I want to improve 

But then I self-sabotage 

I say I’m going to try harder 

Then I give up 

I feel ill equipped to talk to God

And ask for anything

I feel at a loss for words

When I have failed this much

But maybe today 

I’ll just sit and listen 

And stop trying to talk 

Because maybe what I need right now 

Is not to talk to God 

But to listen to Him