Retrospect

I wrote this poem a while back and it's something that is very dear to me. A testimony to God's goodness. It was too special to share for a while, but I thought now was a good time.

Retrospect 

I’m looking at the beginning 

From the end 

My heart seems to skip a beat 

At all the things that have changed 

At sixteen I was trusting 

Happy and peppy 

I was self-confident 

Then it all fell apart 

And I did too 

At sixteen and seventeen 

I was broken 

Heartsick and undone 

I felt inside out and useless 

I drew closer to God  

In a way I never had before 

I clung to Him 

And I grew up

I lost part of myself 

And I gained a lot of hurt 

And a lot of wisdom 

At eighteen the hurt eased 

Into a background ache

There, but not constant 

I worked on recovering 

And moving on 

And coming to terms 

Of living differently 

At nineteen 

Everything changed again 

And healing beyond hope

Came to rest on me 

And now I’ve got to learn 

How to live with a full heart 

One that is so different 

Then when I started this journey 

Everything is different 

And as much as this changing hurt 

I wouldn’t change it 

God gave me this cross to bear 

And He choose to take it away 

My cup overflows 

As I look in retrospect 

And see how much He taught me 

How much He loves me 

And how He held me